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  • 4 Jan 2011 - 13:20
    <none>'s picture

    managed to get through xmas and new year madison and i both had some moments which are now coming a little bit more often. I got the death certificate today which made me feel sick even though i saw him you still dont want to believe.The tears are flowing alot more as you do start to know that you are not waking up from the nightmare.
    when we were shopping our 5yo turned and said didint dad tell you all the time to keep your bag zipped up i hope there are more moments like that.
    she has been told when you look up dad is the brightest star up there.We miss him.

    0 comment(s)
  • 2 Jan 2011 - 20:09
    maddie86's picture

    im having one of those days where u feel like the world seems like a horrible place Sad last night my partner told me he didnt go to the sperm bank and hes not going to.. i feel like my dreams of having kids one day arnt as important to him.. i look at all my friends getting engaged, buying houses it seems so unfair that we have to deal with this right now.. i feel like half my friends dont bother talking to me anymore. I want this year to be steady, treatment seems to be working so far, but he still has surgeries and that scares me..

    2 comment(s)
  • 1 Jan 2011 - 15:25
    Vicki Anne's picture

    I finished chemo 6 cycles on Thursday . I have a break now for who knows how long. I get more scans next week and see oncologist the week after. then monitoring every 2 months at this stage. PICC line came out as well on thursday.
    So I feel free for a while. Cancer lesions are still there but hopefully have shrunk more since last scan as well.

    1 comment(s)
  • 27 Dec 2010 - 15:19
    Vicki Anne's picture

    Well I had my first fall yesterday. Came a crashing down flat on my face. I am ok but gave us all a big scare. It happened so quickly, don't remember falling, just landing on my nose. Lucky nothing is broken. A bit of bruising on my nose. Legs just went from under me as I got up to walk. Tried to move to fast I think. not concentrating on my feet. Been very careful since then, Lost a little bit of confidence, using walking stick around the house again.

    2 comment(s)
  • 26 Dec 2010 - 21:25
    <none>'s picture

    kevin and i got married on the 5th november at camden hospital the drs and nurses really did a great job at setting things up but kevin took a turn for the worse and died on 5th of december at 12 noon is when i got the phone call it was a sunday. it still doesnt seem real that he has gone i feel like a robot.

    1 comment(s)
  • 24 Dec 2010 - 23:59
    willow's picture

    Hi everyone - wishing you all a very Merry Christmas and a Happy and Healthy New Year. Thankyou to everyone for their help, support and kindmess in 2010.
    Warm regards, Willow. xoxo

    2 comment(s)
  • 24 Dec 2010 - 14:14
    Sailor's picture

    Whilst this is something of a melodramatic Victorian view of the world, there are aspects of it that sum up for us where things are.

    Have a safe, peaceful and happy Christmas and mat 2011 be better than 2010.

    Cheers

    Sailor

    All day we fought the tides between the North
Head and the South,

    All day we hauled the frozen sheets to scape the
 storm’s wet mouth,

    All day as cold as charity, in bitter pain and
 dread,

    For very life and nature we tacked from head
 to head.

    We gave the South a wider berth, for there the
 tide-race roared;


    0 comment(s)
  • 24 Dec 2010 - 13:27
    Vicki Anne's picture

    Merry Christmas to you all. I do hope you are blessed with lots of loved ones around you at this time.

    4 comment(s)
  • 22 Dec 2010 - 14:39
    Phiross's picture

    I had my first 3 month check up yesterday and I really don't know what I was expecting from it, but I really thought I would get some sort of scan or something to appease my mind. I had a pelvic examination and the doc says all looks good, of course it does, that's what the gyn/onco said even after a colposcopy. Wasn't till they cut into me that they could see anything. So this gives me no relief.

    How do I know that I don't have cancer anymore when I didn't even know I had it in the beginning?

    7 comment(s)
  • 20 Dec 2010 - 18:41
    Bluejandaling's picture

    Bills.
    During treatment I just had to get through it. Shopping therapy was part of getting through it. I told myself, if I get to the other end in one piece, I will have the luxury of paying bills, doing my taxes etc... So now I'm at the other end, and all of a sudden the bills have landed!

    So while I'm navel gazing about life, death and everything in between, the inane reality of living has hit home. And it's nice.

    1 comment(s)

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