I wish

Author: vinouche | August 4th, 2010
vinouche's picture

I wish I could make it easier for them, it is not fair that they have to be in pain because I am sick. Their hope gets built up when tumours shrink , just to be slammed down when it comes back quicker than we thought. They don't deserve this!!!Human power for hope is such that it will always take over despite what we know to be true. It is so hard each time to tell them that it is following its course , the only unknown is how long! They say I have to do all the treatments just in case, but it hurts so much to see their pain. I think perhaps quicker would be better for all.......

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vinouche's picture

Re: I wish

Posted by vinouche - 6 Aug 2010 - 08:58

Thank you for your kind words, yes the one good thing is we have time to say goodbye, I still think it is so hard for our carers to keep carrying on . I think it would be easier if the deterioration in health was gradual instead of one good one bad day. I have been on the other side too and I know it broke my heart to see my mum and dads like this, so to all you carers out there, we love you all and admire what you do for us.
S

chris martin's picture

Re: I wish

Posted by chris martin - 5 Aug 2010 - 21:08

Hi there. I maybe know what you are feeling as I think my dad is going through same thing. I speak to him every night and I know he is getting worse every day to the point where he has trouble breathing. But I think he feels that he has to hide that pain from me but he doesn't realize that is not helping me. I want to be there for him but he thinks he can hide his pain from me but he can't. I know he only wants to protect me and I love him for that but I am at a total loss at the moment

maddie86's picture

Re: I wish

Posted by maddie86 - 5 Aug 2010 - 20:00

this must be so hard for you, but its equally as hard as those who love you... your family is in pain because its natural.. dont be afraid of that.. they love you and seeing you like this knowing theres nothing they can do is the worst thing ever.. i know the feeling.. just try and think of how loved you are.. Smile

thoughts are with you xo

Jules2's picture

Re: I wish

Posted by Jules2 - 5 Aug 2010 - 12:00

Hey vinouche

It is hard to see people suffer. They are in pain as you are in seeing them suffer. I have a friend who i went through treatment with that is in palliative care. The other day we cried together at the thought of her having to say goodbye to her son. We talked about that at least she can say goodbye as opposed to an accident without any warning. We have had some very honest and open discussions and i feel priviledged to be part of her life and to have her friendship. I am sure your family would want you for longer even if it means some pain. Sending you hugsss and a hand to hold.

Julie xo